My Story 1 – from Atheist to Agnostic

So that you have an idea of where I’m coming from, I’m writing a series of blogs telling the story of my journey with God so far.

I started thinking about ‘big issues’ when I was in my early teens, about 13 or 14. What’s life about? Why are we here? Etc. etc. I decided that the story of Jesus was just as much a fairytale as Father Christmas and Robin Hood. I was interested in science, and thought that the physical world was real, and everything else fiction: entertaining stories, but not real. I thought of myself as an atheist.

A few years later, I started my sixth form studies: biology, physics and chemistry. One of the first things we were taught about was Deviations from the Gas Laws: no real gas obeys the gas laws.

I felt that I had to rethink my whole philosophy! Science as I was taught to O level seemed to be a body of facts to be learnt. For A level, we began to learn that science is a process. Observations are made, theories formed, experiments done to test the theories, new observations, theories amended, more experiments… and so it goes on.

Scientific knowledge is not fixed: it’s changing all the time.Image

I got to thinking about fish – how they sense the presence of objects by changes in pressure detected by their lateral line. And dogs – their world consists of smells and sounds; sight is not as important to them as it is to us.

The world of fish and dogs must be very different from the one we experience – yet it’s all the same world.

Gradually I decided that there was room for god/God in my picture of the universe. I now thought of myself as an agnostic.

My thoughts stayed much the same until I went to university. What happened next is for another post…

By the way: one of my frustrations with Richard Dawkins is that his thinking seems be stuck where mine was in my mid-teens. I’ve moved on, and can’t take much of what he writes very seriously. I was quite disappointed when I read ‘The God Delusion’ – I had expected better than that from a professor of biology.


About Sandra Delemare

follower of Jesus, retired mental health nurse, writer. Interests: crochet, photography, wildlife I blog on biblical meditation, mental health and crochet. I'm also posting a series on my life story so people know where I'm coming from.
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4 Responses to My Story 1 – from Atheist to Agnostic

  1. scskillman says:

    This is an excellent post. I was fascinated by it, and thoroughly agree with your remarks about Richard Dawkins. I look forward to hearing about the next stage of your journey.

  2. I agree with what you say about Dawkins. The first time I read The God Delusion I was a strong Christian (before my crisis of faith) and his poor arguments confirmed totally for me that there is a God not that there wasn’t. Even when I was in my time of thinking I’d become an atheist his arguments never seemed strong to me. He seemed to be saying at one point, the universe is improbable so therefore God is improbable. The opposite has always seemed to me to be true. The universe is improbable so therefore God is more probable.

    Looking forward to hearing more about your story.

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